(The salvation testimony of Howard “Lee” Poskey)
Hi there, thank you for sharing some of your valuable time with me. It’s a great blessing for me to share my experience of God’s grace with you. (I’m going to include scripture references as a witness to my testimony as well).
I was born in 1965 and raised without religion, but during the mid 1980s I experienced an intense (but short-lived) religious season in my life. However after I abandoned that religious experience, I became increasingly evil in my heart throughout my adult life, (all the while I believed myself to be a Christian). But in fact, Christ had not yet been formed in me, (Galatians 4.19).
You see, like all of God’s elect, God had chosen & saved me in Christ before the world began, (Ephesians 1.4, & 2 Timothy 1.9). But I wouldn’t experience God’s miracle of my being born again & receive His forgiveness, sanctification, and righteousness until it was God’s appointed time of love to reveal His Son in me, (John 3.3-8, Acts chapter 9, Acts 26.18, 1 Corinthians 1.24-31, 2 Corinthians 5.21, & Galatians 1.15,16).
And in the midst of my spiritual death & lifestyle of rebellion against God, in 2012 He pursued me & quickened me unto spiritual life.
my main fear during that time of God’s drawing me to Himself was: “I had committed so much wickedness over the years, surely God couldn’t forgive me, not after all the evil stuff that I had done.” I was internally consumed with my sin guilt, and I would respond the only way that I could respond: I would put my face to the ground and beg God over and over again to “please forgive me of my sins,” and to “please don’t throw me away.” (That went on for months). It was an internal combination of extreme guilt consciousness, and an extreme craving to be forgiven of my sin & to be reconciled unto God. [God’s repeated cycle of drawing me to Himself by causing me to crave His mercy before I would experience it, reminds me a lot of the biblical account of how Joseph repeatedly drew his brothers to himself in Genesis chapters 42-45].
God’s truth of His forgiveness for my sins (Colossians 2.13), came alive inside of me one night while I was all alone driving my truck. And when His truth of sin forgiveness was quickened inside of me, I literally screamed and yelled in blissful relief…”I’M FORGIVEN! I’M FORGIVEN! I’M REALLY AND TRULY FORGIVEN!” As I jumped up and down banging on my truck’s headliner. Praise God, I was born again!!! OH THE RELIEF TO BE FORGIVEN!!! IT’S INDESCRIBABLE!!!
I’m so thankful that God took that burden of guilt off of me! He gave me the blessed relief that I needed when He made me spiritually alive. Exactly as described in Ephesians 2.1: “And you hath he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins“
By grace through faith, (Ephesians 2.8-9), God made me to know & receive the risen Lord Jesus Christ’s death, burial, and resurrection as my total forgiveness and justification before God the Father, (Romans 4.24-25, & 1 Corinthians 15.1-4). [The Lord Jesus Christ bled & died for the sins of His people, (Isaiah 53.8, & Revelation 1.5].
(I was also baptized by immersion in the early days of having been born again by the Spirit of God).
And may I add please, that something profound happened to my insides when God made me born again. This miracle of new spiritual birth didn’t end at my receiving relief from my sin guilt. I now crave to follow God every day, and I can’t get enough of His word; His word is like air that I must have continually. Literally everything that defines who I am in my spirit is a new person, and all of it is thanks to the risen Lord Jesus Christ for giving me His life.
I didn’t give my life to Christ; He gave His life to me.
For a brief explanation of how I know that I’m saved, it’s this:
2. God now indwells me, His Spirit bears witness with my spirit, (Romans 8.9-16).
3. I rest in the finished work of the risen Lord Jesus Christ. His death, burial, and resurrection is the sum-total of my right-standing with God the Father. I rest in the Lord Jesus Christ’s righteousness; His righteousness is my righteousness, (Philippians 3.9 & Hebrews 4.3-11).
All glory to the risen Lord Jesus Christ! And no glory to us whatsoever!